Originally written Jan. 6, 2012
I started writing this sometime back in October or November, when I hit a patch of books that all started to bleed together. Despite the fact that they were those books that were high on entertainment and not much else, it exhausted me, just like this list eventually did and I didn't really get back to it until now. Hence why, unlike my usual angry tirades I go through when I write reviews, I obviously don't really care anymore at the closing paragraph.
REVIEW: Random Urban Fantasy Books I've Read
Genre
I believe I've approached this before in a loose sense, when I bitched about that book with dragons, tattoos and gods or something, and what bothered me a lot (aside from... well, most of it), was the fact that if you had magic powers, they will be godlike, and you will be awesome. This seems to be a common theme in these stories, and often times, if it doesn't start out like that, it will eventually. I mean, this is why they're the main characters right? Because interesting things happen to them, they keep not dying in fights and we want to read it. It's like an RPG in book form without that annoying grinding and getting lost in dungeons.
But anyway, I don't want to make over arching generalizations about the whole genre since I haven't read all that many, but I can pretty much say that these are the things I picked up on as general themes:
- Ass kicking. There will be a lot of ass kicking. All supernatural creatures and magic users will have some ability to heal fast, or get hurt just enough for them to continue functioning so in the next book, they'll still have all their limbs and a perfectly fine back.
- Snarking. As a show to prove how 'urban' and modern the world is in juxtaposition to the 'old world' magics hidden from the public, how else to prove this by making the main character savvy with their present day vernacular and their teenage boy ability to make witty quips? (Okay, I may have gotten specific with that one.)
- Mutt sidekicks. Or some sort of posse made up of an eclectic group of characters, like a werewolf/vampire/succubus/god/wizard (they will either be young teenagers and also full of wit and sassy attitude or super old, but look not a day older than 50 and they will have the manners of a respectful elder). Also, the animal mascot will be more than your standard pup- it will be special and it will have its own powers of sorts.
- If there are women, they will all be unbelievably hot and sexy. And lithe. God I fucking hate that word, but male supernatural authors seem to love it. Oh, and if your main character is male, she will want to fuck him at one point. And if the females are supernatural creatures themselves, they will mock the present day 'prudeness' of people today and possibly be naked for fun (or just not be aware that people wear clothes), or wearing something that accents their lithe body and the author goes in great detail about their dress. Or, if the woman's evil, she will be supremely evil and manipulative- you know, standard super dominatrix bitch.
- Speaking of if your main character is male, they'll be described in that fake modesty that YA authors sometimes do- except of talking of their oh-so-plain hair, it'll be about downplaying their abilities.
- Everyone's a bit of an anti-hero but not really, and it's mostly because of their unwillingness to do shit for free or something. You know, reasons that are actually quite logical to the non magical world for not wanting to get involved in a potentially dangerous job.
- Main character will be broke. All the time. Shitty car, shitty apartment, shitty little office. Or if they're not broke, they're super, extremely modest and have like, old furniture or a bunch of antiques- things that will ground them into having a softer side to their personality or some quirky Dude-like attachment to the rug or something.
- Woman main characters in urban fantasy = woman main characters in supernatural romance, except with more sarcasm, less money and a gun. Or they're the same, whatever.
Now there's nothing wrong with any of this, I admit. It's its own genre, much like how romance novels will always have some hilarious purple-y prose sex scene, metaphors and all. It's just a bit of a shame that with all the potential in mixing fantasy with modern day elements you get the same stuff, over and over again. Kinda like how fantasy itself is just a rehash of Tolkien and the middle ages. You just have to be in the mood for it, which, after two books I was not.
